I hate computers and refuse to be bullied by them. Yeah, I came first in jiggery pokery, what about you? A little gratitude wouldn’t irretrievably damage my ego. Safety precaution. I’m allergic to certain gases in the praxis range of the spectrum. If the gas is present, the celery turns purple… I eat the celery. If nothing else, I’m sure it’s good for my teeth. I’m half human. On my mother’s side. Now, don’t antagonize her. I love a happy medium! I think it’s time to find your Achilles heel, or should I say – flipper.

Our lives are different from anybody else’s. That’s the exciting thing. Nobody in the universe can do what we’re doing. You may be a doctor. But I’m the Doctor. The definite article, you might say. You are the only mystery worth solving. You need to get yourself a better dictionary. When you do, look up ‘genocide’. You’ll find a little picture of me there, and the caption’ll read ‘Over my dead body’. Soon, I expect. Or later. One of those. Do try and keep out of my way in future and in past, there’s a good fellow. The time continuum should be big enough for the both of us.

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Can I talk about planets now? I don’t want to go. You were expecting someone else? Jo, look. That’s Skaro. Shut up, K-9! When this is all over, you can find a shoulder to cry on. But for now, you need me. There are fixed points throughout time where things must stay exactly the way they are. This is not one of them. This is an opportunity! Whatever happens here will create its own timeline, its own reality, a temporal tipping point. The future revolves around you, here, now, so do good! Nine hundred years of time and space, and I’ve never been slapped by someone’s mother.

So these are my replacements. A dandy and a clown. It may be irrational of me, but human beings are my favorite species. There are fixed points throughout time where things must stay exactly the way they are. This is not one of them. This is an opportunity! Whatever happens here will create its own timeline, its own reality, a temporal tipping point. The future revolves around you, here, now, so do good! I don’t like it. Grace, I came back to life before your eyes. I held back death. Look, I can’t make your dream come true forever, but I can make it come true today.